Why did the young boy fail his math test? Because he had down syndrome.

Q: Why did Tom bought a new sweeper? A : because his grandma fired their maid

What's black and blue and hates sex? A rape victim.

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What do you call it when a multiple personality disorder person masturbates? Rape.

Why do ducks have flat feet? To stomp out forest fires Why do elephants have flat feet? To stomp out flaming ducks

How do you get Pikachu on a bus? Through forceful action.

Why did the chicken cross the road...

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Your mama's so stupid she brought syrup to the quidditch world cup because she knew there would be quaffles!

Whats the difference between pizza and a Jewish person? Pizza doesnt scream when being put into an oven.

A blonde, brunette, and redhead find a cliff that is supposed to turn you into something which you exclaim upon leaping from the cliff. The brunette jumps off and exclaims: BIRD! She thus falls to her death on a ton of pointy rocks. The other two loot her corpse and walk away.

:Knock Knock :Who's there? :....... No one was there because they were ding dong ditchers.

A horse walked into a bar. The bartender said "why the long face?" The horse then panicked, and feeling threatened, it kicked the bartender with its hind legs and galloped out of the bar. A civilian took immediate control of the situation and dialed the number for animal control, who arrived shortly and tranquilized the deer and put it back in its natural habitat. Don't worry, that didn't actually happen

The world blows up and everyone except for one man and his house make it out alive "Knock knock" "Whos there?" "Me" "Me who?" "Ummmm, its me, duh" It turns out the man was very bored and decided to go knock on his own door and tell knock knock jokes

A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

A buddhist walks up to a hotdog stand asks the server to make him one with everything

What is 100(1+1) -100 + 50 x2 - 300? 0. But who cares? The answer is as worthless as you.

Why is the sky blue during day? Because it would be night if it was black.

What do you call a jewish womans boobs? JUBES!

Do you want to hear a joke? No.

Yo momma so old some said act ur age and she dies

Why did the chicken cross the road? Apple

women are like buddhist shrines, you don't piss on them

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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