one time at band camp there was a guy guess what he played? no one knows

What did the drunk man say to the average civilian? Blahaahahahahahuhuh!

Why did the man eat the apple? He had just witnessed a cow butchering and decided to become a vegitarian the moment he got home. He now lives in 1st degree depression because of what he saw 2 hours ago.

What's green and doesn't fly? A broken green helicopter.

what is red, yellow, green, blue, purple, and violet? Blood i lied about the other colors...

No

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? -- Because it was dead Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -- Because it was stapled to the squirrel

What does a vegetarian eat? colored penis

TIMMY

Tilt your screen back .

I forgot to tell you something I forgot wat it was

How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Any number if compressed sufficiently. At neutron star density all babies in the world would fit.

Why did the little girl cry? She lives in Haiti.

how come jenny could not fall asleep? their was a man standing outside her window holding a knife

whats worse than a leaf in your bed? World hunger, global warming, the economy......

There's an Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman. They are all trapped in a jail cell. Eventually they all starved to death.

How can you tell a blonde a brunette and a red head apart? Ask them if that is their natural hair color.

a guy walks into a bar.. ouch

Your momma's so fat she ate oranges and coffe

What's black and white and red all over? A blood-soaked zebra

Knock knock. Who's there? A bad joke.

what do you call a man that is hurt? A: you call him an ambulanse

"Merry Christmas, Mom! My gift to you is...ME!" "I brought you into this life you disrespectful brat!" He then proceeds to a cliff.

Chuck Norris once stared in a show called Walker: Texas Ranger.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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