Your momma's so not fat that when a school bus rolled by here house, she just sat there and turned on oprah.

What did the cat say to the dog? Communism

Wanna hear a dirty joke? The pig rolled in the mud!

What's in the sky? Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it's a helicopter.

A Rabbi walks into a bar. He does not order any alcoholic beverages, because Orthodox Jews aren't allowed to consume alcohol except for certain times and religious customs.

Ask me if I'm a cucumber. Are you a cucumber? No.

one time at band camp there was a guy guess what he played? no one knows

Why did Bob the Builder die? He had cancer.

Why are people in Africa dying? because the majority of them have a lack of food and fresh water which effects their health.

A rabbai , a mexican , and a ginger are In a car going over a cliff. Which one dies? Who cares?

Why was Justin Beiber Booed off the stage. Because I spelt his last name incorrectly.

What is yellow and white and goes 150 miles down a railroad track? a duck.

Have u seen stevie wonders new house? No. Niether has he

I baked a pie once. Guess what flavor it was. PIE FLAVOR!

What does the ship say when it's cold? Shiver me timbers

A dimetrodon, a pterosaur and a chicken walk into a bar. As they enter, the bartender says "Hold it! We are not licensed to serve dinosaurs." "I am not a dinosaur," said the dimetrodon. "Neither am I," said the pterosaur. "But I am," said the chicken. So the dimetrodon and the pterosaur enjoyed a cold beer each, but the chicken had to wait outside.

I took your mother out for a classy steak dinner. I decided not to call her agian because we weren't very compatible and the conversation was very superficial.

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, You Have A Face That Belongs At The Zoo, Don't Worry I'll Be There With You, Not In The Cage But Laughing At You!!! :D

theres a straight guy, a gay guy ,and a jew the weird part is the straight guy hits on the jew and the gay guy which make the situation all akward.

why didn't the chicken cross the road? It was very unhealthy, and had a heart attack attempting too

What do you call Charlie Sheen when he's on drugs? Charlie Sheen.

A whore walks in to a bar. She soon finds her John and they leave to his hotel room.

who can be more evil than the person who hit my nuts. Adolf Hitler.

A priest and a rabbi attempt to take a whale to a bar. But due to the enormous size and the need for water, the whale couldnt come.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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