Whats black, dead, and hangs from a tree in my backyard? Your Mom

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car? A danger to society.

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Q: what did Don Draper do after he saw an attractive woman at the ABC store? A: went home and thought about her while drinking his scotch.

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why was the toddler sad? he was diagnosed with cancer after his dog was put down because it raped and murdered his parents

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue U suck Dick Just Like Ur Dad did to u

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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What's the difference between Rick Perry and a toaster? One is a republican presidential candidate, while the other is an electrical appliance.

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What was pauls mum screaming? Rape

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I think poop is tasty... just kidding.

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What's the difference between a snake, and a lawyer? A snake cannot comprehend law, nor can one attend law school and set up an office. They are also different species.

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Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

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A bra walks into a dyslexic man.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side.

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what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

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this is not a drill.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Wrong. Violets should be purple.

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they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A worm in your intestinal tract.

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Knock Knock who's there its black george washington.

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whats worse than a kane nothing

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Did you hear phonsi was Gay? I just found out too, he walked into the diner and said, "ive got AAIIIIIDS."

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Why did the black man buy a watermelon..... so he can eat it.

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What's red and has two legs? Half a cat!

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What's brown and smells like paint? -Poop. I don't know why it smells like paint though..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops