How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Mice don't have the strength required to do that.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was simply wandering around and happened to walk from one side of the road to the other.

What's large, black and can be found in Australia? A large black Australian man.

what did batman say to robin to get him into the car? Get in the car

Why couldn't the old man see? He was deaf

Name three similarities between racism and sexism I, S and M

whats worse than having ice cream and not eating it? Being lactose intolerant

Snape dies. ^ Spoiler Alert tarelona major

What do the angels say when god sneezes? Chuck bless you

This is an anti-joke. It is not funny because "anti" means the opposite of something.

Why did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not. Sally..

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the baby monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

Roses are red, violets are blue, This is false, Violets are purple.

why did the chicken cross the road? there was a black man walking towards him

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

How do you fit 500 babies into a phone booth? With a blender. How do you get them out? Nachos (make a dipping and snacking motion).

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

Why did the teenager crash his car? He had no arms

Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witnesses, can we have a moment of your time?

Q. What does the kool aid man say when he breaks into a wall A. Ow

what does nba stand for? Nothing but Africans

richard is fag

Why are Black Guys Black? Migration and adaptation to the harsh heat of the southern Sahara Desert. DUH.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...