- Anti Joke

What did little jonny do when he broke his leg? He proceeded to brake into tears due to the excruciating pain caused by his unfortunate injury.

Knock Knock Who's there? Kelly Oh hi Kelly! Long time no see! I know! I've been my working fingers to the bone ever since I got that promotion and I barely have any free time! That must be tough. It is but it pays bills! Being a mother of three isn't a task for the faint of heart. Now Kelly,I was wondering how you thought of the remodeled kitchen....

A watermelon, a cherry, a mango, and a peanut are sitting at the table for dinner. They are all eating chicken wings and watching the superbowl between the Packers and the Patriots. What is wrong with the situation? Well two things are wrong, cherry's cannot communicate with peanuts because they speak different languages(obviously). And the patriots fucking suck.

Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

A German challenged an Englishman to a duel But their neigbours found out and alerted the police

When life gives you lemons. Don't take things from strangers

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? If the socket were 20 feet in the air, it might take 4 blondes with really good balance. Then again, it might not matter how many blondes there are because there are no replacement light bulbs, the don't have transportation, and the nearest store is 10 miles away. In conclusion, I would say that the number of blondes it takes to screw in a light bulb is dependent on the individual situation at hand.

Why do beavers have flat tails? They don't know but their relatives certainly get upset

Yo mama so fat she makes blind kids cry

You know what topping goes bad with ice cream? Chloroform

Roses are red Violets are blue Today is Valentines Day I am depressed

what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, you already told her twice.

How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. One to screw in the light bulb and one to suck my dick.

how do you kill a black guy ? AIDS

what does a horny frog say RUBIT RUBIT

Why was the girl sad? Because borat came had DA SEXI TIME with yo mother in law:)

Your mum is so ugly that i make jokes about how ugly she is

A: My dog has no nose! B: How does he smell? A: He cannot smell, because he has no nose.

What's big, red and delicious? A prune. I lied about it being big, red and delicious.

?Three men walk in to a bar. one walks with a limp. The other two make fun of him and joke of his inability to walk as well as others around him.

69.

What do you get when you cross a muffin with chocolate chips? A chocolate chip muffin.

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

A man walks into a bar, he realizes he has no money and leaves

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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