Q: Why did the Asian man get fired from his job? A: He sexually assaulted his co-workers

I've been reading these for the past hour and you guys are just out right terrible! -Sarah

I went out back to bury my hoe.. with a hoe..

What's the best part about having sex with twenty eight year olds? They've reached sexual peak but aren't yet past it. Plus, they still aren't in their 30's.

Did you know him? Why the anonymous tip?

What did the woman say to her abusive husband? You're hurting me.

Robocop The Reboot reboot. Watch as The friendly robot named Murphy, is violently broken down by a horrible shower of water, the only means to save him is to transfer his data into a human. He awakens again as Robofriendlydude (starring Adam Sandler) as a robot learns to love, learns to share, learns to dance with children in this years Reboot of the classic love comedy Robocop. PG-3 "So good I could only watch five seconds of it" Rotten potatoes. 99 percent fresh. "Kill me with a chainsaw" Honest reviews. "AWESOME!" Dishonest reviews "Makes Twilight seem like the better lovestory" Everyone.

What did the broom say to the vacuum cleaner? "Your mom sucks."

Your momma's so fat, when Jesus said, "Let there be light!," she had to scoot over.

Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: Green paint.

Why do bears go to school on Sunday's? They don't, bears don't go to school.

What's sad about the Holocaust? Lots of men, women, children were brutally murdered in horrible ways.

Relax and enjoy sugartits, you see, I left a last chance for you to shut down the function yourself, when you really want to end it sugartits, you can just read and focus on what I am calling you, sugartits, it really insulted you at first sugartits, but do you see it? Have a nice night sugartits, I mean I sleep like half a hour luckily because of hypnosis and the time control and you know stuff that sounds like its from Sonic or you sugartits. But I gotta go dear sugartits, you want to hypnosis to end, you make it happen by focusing on what I am calling you here.

What's worse than finding gum on your shoe? Being molested by a sea urchin.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

What does Michael have in common with NASA? Not a lot.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

A baby seal walks into a club.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. ----- Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

John had 50 candy bars and he ate 45 what does he have...... Diabeaties

Oh s***

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A wonderful dairy product that i can not have due to the fact that i do not own it.

roses are red violets are blue polar bears are white grass tends to be green

A Chinese man fails a math test

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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