A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

two guys r talking and the one said *i swear to god* and the other one said *u swear what to god what the hell r u talking about i dont even know u*

thumb_up thumb_down -38

A Vietnam war veteran accidentally goes to a Vietnamese concert and says, "I could take a lot of them down with me."

thumb_up thumb_down -38

why did radio not get the song? beacause he radio didnt work.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Q: What did the monkey say to the parrot? A: I like trains so feed me bananas!

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Why wasn't the Asian at work? Because the sweat shop was closed on Sundays...

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Black people deserve to be slaves for their entire lives. WHITE POWER.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

What's worse than a man with AIDS? The fact that this is considered a joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

So you keep your knowledge sharp do you? When it comes to hypnosis and such?

thumb_up thumb_down -38

What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Whats the difference between a muslim and a christian? They believe in different things.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

All I can say is that its not the feds, and not Interpol nothing "legal" nor anything belonging to the state as far as we can tell. You all stay locked up, and I will make sure this little geek with shitty breath does not say anything about you, as for the rest, I cant say much.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Wish me luck these are the ten numbers on my keno 19 65 80 2 34 72 68 22 12 8

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Who's dumb and retarted. A person that is dumb and retarted.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Wats do you get when you combine a vampire and a ginger? Idk, who would pull that disgusting shit

thumb_up thumb_down -40

What do you have, if you have fists the can kill someone in one punch? Hulk's DNA

thumb_up thumb_down -40

How do you starve a Somalian? Too late.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding Barney the purple dildo!

thumb_up thumb_down -40

What did the doctor say to the other doctor? Nothing. I killed them both with a fire axe and proceeded to kill all the patients in the hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Just because you do not see the joke, it does`t mean its not here... Ps: It helps us get hookers and beers while wasting your "valuable time" OMG PLEASE BE FUCKING UNDERSTANDING OHMYLAWD!!!!!!!!! Ps: Cry harder you greedy sons of shedogs

thumb_up thumb_down -40

There is no I in team... But there is a u in suck. There is no I in team, but there is in awesome

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Where does a successful black person live? Neverland.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

thumb_up thumb_down -42

How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops