Your mother is so fat, that she's working really hard to get back in shape so that she can support her family.

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Q. why didnt the boy get a christmas present from his dear grandmother? A. because she died on thanksgiving

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What did the peanut butter say to the jelly?

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Why did the woman die? She was hit by a bus.

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what did the clinically depressed man last post on twitter? "Oh cruel world, i finally lost all faith in the good of humanity. I am unloved and irrelevant to all. I know nobody will miss me, but goodbye anyway. #suicide " nobody followed him and saw the post and he died alone with nobody at his funeral.

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How do you keep a dog from chasing it's tail? cut off it's legs.

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I man walks into a bar. He got drunk.

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Yo mamma is so hairy that she had to shave

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a man eats at a restaraunt alone, because all the people he loved died in a tragic boating accident while he was out of town on a business trip

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Why did the man cross the inerstate? Well, he only got half way till he got hit by a truck, but he wanted to, it was suicide. oh ya, it wasnt a man it was a chicken. oh well. They are both dead.

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How do you start a Mexican parade? You roll a quarter down a hill

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how do you get 100 dead babies in a bucket? use a blender. how do you get 100 dead babies out of a blender? Doritio's

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Why did Jack and Jill fall down the hill? Because they were donuts

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A dirty joke: The white horse fell in the mud.

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What's white and black and red all over? Slaughtered Cows.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running. From the forest. That hell hole. He had got away, but he could remember. The darkness. The silence. Until the unmistakable scream of the guns and then- The Running. The Screaming. The Blood, oh the blood. Seeing Charlie. Oh, that damned soul Charlie. The bullet went right- But that was long ago. So long. But sometimes, in the silence, Chicken remembers. The Running. The Screaming. The Blood. And he screams.

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Aaron Cummings is me. Find me on facebook:)

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What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing because they are on opposite sides of the earth

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I'm not unemployed. I'm on sabbatical. Hey! Don't get all religous on me.

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What's black and white, and red all over? A police car. Well, maybe it's not red all over. Just that little light on top. Oh, and the tail lights.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar..... Wait..... How?

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What did I say when I fell of THEEeEeeeeeeee...

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If Life gives you melons, then I think your dislexic

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Why do Jewish people where hats in church? They feel there head will often get cold

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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