"hey you know that graveyard down the street." "yeah." "people are dying to get in there."

In soviet Russia... there is a distinct probability that you will get mugged due to the high crime rate and gang ruled streets.

Whats worse than bad sex. Being nice raped in the anus by a teletubby.

What do you call a Jew picking up a quarter? Whatever his name is?

wat?

What is black blue and screaming? Your daughter when i kicked the shit out of her

A man cheats on his wife and ruins his marriage of 24 years.

Why was the black man chasing the little girl? The black man was the adoptive parent of the little girl and they were playing tag.

Knock knock, come in.

Jonathan is like a btterfly. They're both asianu

Why did the homosexual rapist walk into the pizza shop? Because he was hungry after a long day of raping little boys.

What do you think about whats happening in the middle east right now? You're an idiot.

o | ,'~'. / \ | ____|_ | '___,,_' .----------------. | ||(o |o)| ( KILL ALL HUMANS! ) | ------- ,----------------' | _____| -' \ '####, ------- /________\ ( ) |) '_ ' ,------|\ _ /_ / | |_\ || /_ /| | o| _\ _|| /_ / | | |\ _\____//' | ( ( | | | (_,_,_,____/ \ _\ | ------| \ _\|_________| \ _\ \__\\__\ |__| |__||__| ||/__/ |__||__| |__||__| |__||__| /__)/__) /__//__/ /__//__/ /__//__/. .' '. '. (_kOs____)____)

I was going to write a joke about how I have alzheimers but than I forgot it

A jew walks into a bar. The bartender says "get out you jew!" The bar tender apparently was a Nazi.

How did the old man climb the hill? He didn't.

Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

Q .What robin told to batman before they got into the car? A. Get into the car!!

What is wrong with racism? A lot of things.

There once was a man from Nantucket who secluded himself from the outside world because of a tragic event that happened to him as a child.

What do you call a Mexican mixed with a platypus? a pineapple

Me: so Megan did it hurt Megan fox: did what hurt? Me: when ur aged face wasn't good enough for the new transformers movie?

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Why did Hitler smell the flower? Chicken dick.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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