Why did the girl fall out of the tree? Because she had no arms

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His name is Frosted Mike, and he neither has nor does not have a penis.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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Why are Asians so good at math? because of their work ethic and determination to become the best at everything.rice.

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Presidents are black Rappers are white Welcome to 2011

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A boy called Justin bieber fell down a hole and died

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What is better than one wors roll - two wors rolls

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How did Ronald McDonald die He was hit by a big mac

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There was a man that Invited Bruce Wayne, Superman, Peter Parker, Batman, Clark Kent and Peter Parker to his party He was really sad when he heard only half of them could attend...

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A horse walks into a bar. He politely holds the door for a young woman.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? To get to the other side!

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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How to pick up chicks Pick up a chicken but must be a baby

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Q. What does the pencil and the basketball have in common? A. They both are made from wood, except for the basketball.

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how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit him with an ax

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the seat next to you? A: Whatever his name happens to be.

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Why does my friend pick up trash? Because he is a garbageman

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Hey, I want to because you are really sweet and deserve it, and damn you are hot, but thats secondary in your case, in every case actually, otherwise I would just be doing it with meat whose soul and thoughts I hate/dislike/detest/etc, and that is not who I am. Once huh? I mean I said night/day/shower/breakfast table... Not so sure I can last for that long with a girl as hot and sweet as you for that long. Kidding, hey, best friend huh? Wow, I mean that`s really sweet, and you are really a special friend to me, but uh, to be honest, best friend? I barely know you... I hate this part of myself, I am blunt with that honesty thing, I may just have insulted you, but you know, I also need to be able to live with myself If I am going to enjoy life.

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What's the difference between a Lawyer and a hooker? Job description, income, and an incredibly large list of other things.

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes Good. Enjoy your cold drinks.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it all began in 1807 when a 7 foot rooster gave birth to a chicken on the sidewalk while purchasing ice cream. Scientists have been intrigued so they went into study with it and won the Nobel prize. This somehow persuaded them to lure the chicken over to the other side by using a lollipop. They threw the lollipop as the chicken crossed the road, hit it in the eye, the chicken spazzed out, jumped in front of a car, teleported to London, and is now a gynecologist.

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how did the man with just a head hide the fact that he murdered someone? im not sure but this seems highly untrue as someone could not kill someone with just their head.

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Yo momma's so stupid, she got a moderately low score on her SATs, and sadly, was not excepted by any colleges she applied to, and never got a job. This is why she became depressed, and resorted to suicide to escape the growing pain.

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A guy walks into a bar, unfortunately for him, he walked in on a huge bar fight and managed to get the hell knocked out of him as he entered the door.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops