Inspirational story: There once was an ugly old man who was so ugly everyone died. The end -Matt

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A:Knock Knock B:It's open

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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my friend said this website was funny, you know what i said?.... its really not!

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what did the frog say to the plane HE NO CRY SO I CRY FOR HIM

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Why couldn't the cat drink the milk? Because it had no face.

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How do you kill a blonde? Push her off a cliff.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? about 900 pounds

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The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

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Q: What would you think if a homeless person asked, "Spare change for drugs and cigarettes?" A: At least he was being honest.

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How do u get a dog to sit? Teach it to sit then tell it to sit.

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Why do people who walk into bars never have names?

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How do you wake up lady gaga? poke her face.

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What do a black man and a dog have in common? They're both going to die some day.

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I'm a wise old man, so I'm aloud to touch you in the bathing suit area.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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your face

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I woke up this morning and ran five miles. I am proud of myself for engaging in such a healthy lifestyle.

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Roses are red, Facebook is blue, we have mutual friends, and violets are blue and roses are red. FRIDGE

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Why did Anakin tell Luke he was his father? Because honest people never lie

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What do you call a blonde person? By her name.

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0 1 this is a sad sad world.

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What did the black guy say to the white guy? The black guy said, "hello". They then proceeded to have a normal conversation.

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What is the biggest lie in the entire universe? " I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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