What did the comedian say when he fell off the cliff? Nothing; dead beings are incapable of performing actions.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did Suzie fall of the swing???? she had down syndrome

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do call a man with no arms or no legs that sits on the couch? Grandpa after his amputations.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

roses are gray, violets are grayer, f*ck this poem and listen to the slayer.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm really drunk so show me your tits.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

a dyslecstic son seys to his mum can i have a mcdonald for tea the mum seys ye if you can spell mcdonlds and the son seys fuk that im having a kcf

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Ask me what my favorite color is. What's you favorite color? Blue.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the french toast say to the french fry? I don't know, I don't speak french.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

thumb_up thumb_down -16

You were born.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

100% of the people who go to school die. What about the people who don't go to school? They die too.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's black and can't swim? A black shirt.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How can you tell a baby lost it's voice? It doesn't scream when you staple it to a ceiling fan and turn it on.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what the deference between a priest and acne well the acne doesn't come on the kids face tell hes thirteen

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A mermaid found a magic lamp at the bottom of the ocean. She rubbed it and a cat with 9 lives came out so he didn't drown.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

why did the chicken cross the road? because he was stapled to the head of a penis that belonged to an asian man

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the man wipe his bum with a sweat-shirt? Because they were all out of toilet paper

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Whats the difference between KFC and Starbucks? KFC didn't murder your sister.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call 10 black people swimming down a current? A happy family

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what do you do when you see a black man punching a girl? act like you dont see it and get the hell out of harms way

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Click here for free sandwich.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Last Christmas I gave you my heart But the very next day Your body rejected it and you went into cardiac arrest, we both died

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's worse than a pile of dead babies? Two piles of dead babies.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops