What do you call a woman with one leg? I don't know. I am not in the position, currently, of knowing anyone who finds themselves in such an unfortunate condition.

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Why did the two blonds go to the bar together? Because they were carpooling to save money and help save the earths ozone layer that seals in all of our oxygen. They were also meeting some friends.

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How long did it take Jeff, a middle-aged man with a lifelong speech-destroying lisp, to overcome his impediment? Less than ten minutes, as carbon monoxide is a colorless, odorless toxic gas that eliminates oxygen at a rapidly-acting rate inside of small areas such as the car Jeff locked himself inside.

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Roses are red, pink, white or yellow. Stop stereotyping my arrogant fellow.

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What does little Tommy and a tomato have in common? They are both vegetables. Oh wait, a tomato is a fruit.

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A priest and a small child enter a bar. The bartender takes his son back from the priest, paying him $30 for his exemplary babysitting services.

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Ask me if im a truck. Are you a truck? Yes.

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza is an Italian food and a jew is a human that practices the Jewish faith

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You walk into a shopping centre, what wont you see? Madelin McCann.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was a loaf of bread.

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Joe Paterno walks into a bar...he should've walked into a police station and filed a report.

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How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb? None they're dead.

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Why din't Santa come to Timmy's house? Timmy died 6 months ago. :(

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I like my wine like I like my children... Eight years old and locked in a cellar

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you dint have to be a jew matt

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

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Why did Jessica fall off the swing? She doesn't have any arms Knock, knock Whose there? Not Jessica

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How did the Mexican cross the border without getting caught? He didn't; he was executed immediately.

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It's caoimhin I wasnt writing cos kane turned my computer off the bel end aodhans been tuping sayin its be the spa.

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roses are red violets are blue i fucked your mom so did you

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"Tell me a joke" Tom says Your life.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police, your son just died of terroristic bombing.

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knock knock... ....... no one replies.. the family is deff..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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