Roses are red, violets are blue, pee pee is yellow, poo poo is brown. if not you have a serious disease...

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. Due to the height of the fall, one of his ribs pierced his heart and he also suffered extensive head trauma and internal bleeding due to the force when he hit the floor, where he lay in agony for several hours before dying a slow, painful death.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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a black, mexican, jewish, and white man fall off a cliff, who landed first ? all at the same time, they all died and there familys sued the clifff and commited sucicede

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Something told me to write "vote pancakes" so I wrote "Vote Pancakes" it said it was wrong, and now I know why, capitals.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? This joke.

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Why was OJ Simpson's knife covered in blood? Because he just murdered his wife.

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roses are red violets are indigo

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Why is this website called anti joke.com? Because it has anti jokes.

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Q: What's worse than getting hit by a bus? A: Herpes, AIDS, Diarrhea, Constipation, Castration, Super Herpes, or the song "Friday."

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I once was told that life is like a box of chocolates, but then realized that it wasn't

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A man quites his job to open a coffee shop which has been a dream of his for years, The shop does well with a healthy supply of customers and a steady income,The man is now financially stable.

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Ask me Whats 2+2. ? Ok what's 2 plus 2 4 you dumb ass

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On a scale of 1 to Chris Brown how angry are you?

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What do you call a feminist that believes that all women have just as many rights as men? Stupid.

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A terminte walks into a pub and ask is the bar tender here?

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Q: What is Kony's favorite rapper A: SOULJA BOY!!

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You know what I am gonna come up with that could potentially make me millions of dollars? An idea that could potentially make me millions of dollars.

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the firefighter says to the other firefighter: hey firefighter, are we going to fight a fire?

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why did the Asian by a dog because he was lonely

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Q. What did the mockingbird say to the blue jay? A. I mock you by mocking you

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Orchids are white, Sunflowers are yellow

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-Knock knock! -Who's there? -DEFAX.

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How do you drown a blond girl? Forcibly hold her head under water until it enters the lungs and prevents the absorption of oxygen leading to cerebral hypoxia and myocardial infarction.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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