Why was Mary mucky? Because she was dragged to a field and raped

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What do you do when you see an ostrich playing tennis? I don't know as I have little experience in the areas of ostriches or tennis. Frankly, I'm not quite sure why you're even asking me

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A talent agency is giving auditions and is just about to rap it up when a family shows up. They reluctantly agree to their "brief" audition given that they had found no suitable talent that day. The routine starts with the father starting 6 chainsaws at once while simultaneously starting a juggling/lumberjacking routine. His beautiful wife proceeds to toss him additional chainsaws (as he continually throws them for dramatic effect) while also maintaining a hypnotizing dance which seems to drain your desire to leave from your very soul. The children take turns jumping in between the chainsaws while doing a silent replay of the movie, "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon." After it plays out the father tosses the final chainsaw up in the air which lands standing straight, quivering in the dust of the studio. The studio manager says, "Why that's an AMAZING act!! I'll sign you right now! What do you call your act?" In response to which, the father shits on his desk.

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Life on the line? I just do it for the kill and the potential savage rape and consumption! And yeah, a man is not a man but a boy if he cant protect his lady friends. HEY WAIT A FUCKING MOMENT! Why you playing so hard to get now? YOUR FLESH IS MINE! It is just like a billion pages ago where we where talking VERY down and dirty.

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i was quite upset when my girlfriend called me a peodifile, what does she know, shes only 6.

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God is the English name given to a singular being in theistic and deistic religions who is either the sole deity in monotheism, or a single deity in polytheism. He (I use the term 'He' as it is the most common conception) is said to be omniscient, omnipotent, omnipresent, and omnibenevolent. I highly doubt he will give you lemons.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw 'em.

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this website is a bad joke

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what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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knock know. who there?.............. whose there?.........whose there!?!?! damn kids

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor! why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. why did the farmer cross the road? To get his chicken. Why didnt the farmer make it to the other side? He was hit by his tractor.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

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Do the roar!

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Why couldnt the man buy food? Because.

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DONT think about ELEPHANTS. Your thinking about elephants now.

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What's the difference a black person and a park bench? A park bench is a object and a black person is human.

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whats something you really wanna call a black person it starts with an "N" and ends in an "R" A. Friend i was joking about the "N" and "R"

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What is worst then a blond trying to pass collage?....... There is nothin wrong with that

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Why did the jews get off the bus? Because i threw a fridge at it

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three peanuts where walking down a dark alley, one was asalted

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How many black people does it take to tar a roof? Just one. Unless he wants to do it in a shorter amount of time and calls a few friends to help him.

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What did the waitress do when the man asked for pizza? She ran away

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what is black and is a really bad neighbor. your bad neighbor wearing a black shirt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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