Guy: I have a gun get in my van Girl: SHOTGUN!

Eeny meeny miny mo, Catch a tiger by it's toe, If he hollers let him go, Because if you don't he would attack you and go straight for you're neck and you would die a painful death...

what is the meaning of life? i dont know, but im fairly sure its not 42

What do you get when you mix a black person with an octopus? i dont know. but it sure picks cotton well.

Q: how do you fit 100 jews in a car A: 3 in the back one in the passenger seat and 96 in the ash tray

What do you call a black man flying a plane. A pilot.

Tunechi

How many nipples are on a raccoon ? I don't raccoono

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple You thought I was going to steal an anti-joke didnt you squidward

Thankgiving Jimmy: I'm thankful for my family Thomas: I'm thankful for shelter Jake: I'm thankful for running over babies

A blonde walks into an electronic store...she buys an IPhone because someone stole her blackberry, her money, and everything she cares for. Nah, I'm just kiddin', she was murdered.

What did the fish say when he swam into a wall? ouch.

A Women is holding a piece of paper with her rights what is she holding a grocery list

Why did the skeleton cross the street. He didn't.

What is white, sticky, and something that gay people and women love? Frosting.

A duck walks into a convenience store and asks for a tube of chapstick.He says "Put it on my tab".

Whats the difference between Justin Bieber and Elton John? They're both gay.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being disturbed by two black guys raping a young girl with leukemia

Whats the difference between a horse and glue? Nothing

Why arent guys and girls the same? Cause there different

WNBA

If Santa's not real, then who pees on the tree every morning?

roses are red vilits are blue get in the van or i kill you

If I was in a room with Osama bin laden and george bush, and my friend. And I had a gun with two bullets, I'd shoot my friend twice.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...