So a man walks into a bar. Unfortunately, he had brittle bone disease, cracked open his skull and bled to death on the pavement.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

why did the chicken cross the road? he was an escaped mental paitent

thumb_up thumb_down +5

why was 9 afraid of 6 ? because it made her pregnant

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the fly say to the spider? Please, I have a wife and daughter.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How many candles did Johnny blow out on his birthday cake? The same number of candles which corresponds to his age.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Kinky = using a feather Perverted = using the whole chicken Weird = using chicken bones Downright disgusting = all of the above, plus a cat

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Whats Jewish and Funny? A Jewish Comedian.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

what do kids take their lunch in to school. that depends if they buy lunch at school... otherwise they bring it in a lunchbox...

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the racist white guy say to the black guy? "I don't like Asians."

thumb_up thumb_down +5

roses are blue violets are red dont judge me

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did Batman brush his teeth? So he wouldn't get bat breath

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A Jew and a Neo-Nazi meet in a bar. They put aside their differences and enjoy a few rounds of drinks.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do you make a dead baby float? Two scoops of vanilla ice cream and two scoops of dead baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did one cat say to the other cat? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Gingers

thumb_up thumb_down +5

i see trees are green, Roses are red, Violets are blue and i think to myself What a Wonderful World

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Yo mamma so fat when I searched her on the internet, I got 28,000,000 results

thumb_up thumb_down +5

KNOCK KNOCK whos there Malcom i dont know any Malcom go away!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why was the cat meowing really loud? It was on fire. Why did the cat suddenly stop meowing? It died.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you call a clown with no sense of humor? Unemployed.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Relax and enjoy sugartits, you see, I left a last chance for you to shut down the function yourself, when you really want to end it sugartits, you can just read and focus on what I am calling you, sugartits, it really insulted you at first sugartits, but do you see it? Have a nice night sugartits, I mean I sleep like half a hour luckily because of hypnosis and the time control and you know stuff that sounds like its from Sonic or you sugartits. But I gotta go dear sugartits, you want to hypnosis to end, you make it happen by focusing on what I am calling you here.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A amazing I idiots D discover S sex

thumb_up thumb_down +3

whats the difference between a black and a bunk bed? a bunk bed can support 2 kids.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops