Why was a black man running in the street with my wallet in his hand? Because he saw me dropping it and was trying to reach me to give it back.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It got shot. Why did the 2nd koala fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first one. Why did the 3rd koala fall out of the tree? It thought it was a race to the bottom? Why did the 4th koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the 5th koala fall out of the tree? No one knows, not even the guy who made this joke.

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When u outside and the suns out.....stand under raysean u will see a solar eclispe

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order drinks and have a conversation and eventually they leave.

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A tiger walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender gets him a drink because he would rather not get vigorously consumed by a mighty beast.

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Why are elephants ears sooo big? The big ears are to help the elephants stay cool. Elephants don't sweat, so they have a hard time dissipating excess heat (keeping cool). Their large ears contain many blood vessels that allow heat to escape into the air. When you see elephants they are usually moving their ears back and forth. This fanning helps to dissipate more heat than if their ears remained still. The enormous ears of elephants act as cooling devices. The gigantic earflaps (which can measure up to 2 square metres (21.5 square feet) are equipped with an intricate web of blood vessels. When the animal flaps its ears, the blood temperature lowers by as much as 5 degrees Celsius (9 degrees Fahrenheit). To keep cool

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What's the difference between being gay and being homosexual? Nothing really. The two words are synonyms so they can be used interchangeably.

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How many babies can fit inside a trash can? Seven.

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Why couldn't little Billy jump? He was dead.

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why did the girl fell off the hammock? because she didn't have arms and why didn't she got up? 'cause she had no legs and why didn't anyone helped her? 'cause she had no friends and why did she die? 'cause she fell into a puddle facing down

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What do you call a black man carrying a bag full of drugs? A police officer who has just confiscated the bag from a drug dealer and is on his way to send the bag off to be destroyed.

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A penguin bikes to a bakery, the baker asks him "what kind of bread do you want?" Penguin replies "it doesn't matter, im biking"

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why so serious? because your too serious.

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When is the best time to wear a striped sweater? All the time

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What do you get when you cross an alligator and a kangaroo? Nothing. An alligator is a reptile and a kangaroo is a mammal, therefore it is impossible for them to breed.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I am homeless, Can I have some food?

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He is so gay that he likes penis.

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What did the shark say to the elephant? Nothing, they live in different habitats

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Knock knock. Come in. You're under arrest for second degree murder.

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Three men are walking and one falls over, he then gets up and continues walking.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally!

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A woman had a dream. She followed this dream and completed all the goals she had set in life and was excessively happy. Then she woke up and her original suspicions were confirmed...it was a dream.

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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Q: why did the plane crash? A: because jack daniels equals 7

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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