How many sheets did the Asian want on his bed? "You sheet on my bed I kill you!"

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If bananas are purple, then what color are oranges? I am not going to tell you the answer because this joke has no significance whatsoever.

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Michael Vick walks into a pet shop. He buys a puppy and cares for it lovingly

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Skinny people fart less.

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To mama's so fat when she went to Dairy Queen she Ordered a blizzard.

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Wow, that is one of the things I would think I would react all bad to, but that`s, a strangely attractive quality in you.

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Why did the hipster get burned? Because he was a volunteer fireman.

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Q: why did the plain crash A: the driver is a loaf of bread

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Why was six afraid of seven? Back when seven was in Vietnam, he sufferd Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and constantly has flash backs and irrational thoughts of six being with the veitnamese alliance and tries to viciously molest six whenever he runs out of anxiety medication.

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i was born with 99 medical problems, and the difficulty to count till 100.

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What color was the black guy's skin? Brown

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Jovan

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A Chinese man and an African man walk into a bar. Its good to see so much multiculturalism in a usually racist society.

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Suddenly a wild bunny appears ::::::::::::(:oI)

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A bunch of teens were egging the house of their science teacher for giving them homework over break. They got caught by their teacher's ex-husband and he told them, "She broke up with me for telling her she was being too hard on her students. So, my friends, egg on!!!!!"

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What did the black man say to the white man? "Hi"

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What's worse than having a FUPA? The Holocaust

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What did Sir Mix a lot say to the girl with a big butt? Your very beautiful.

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Knock knock Who's there A girl scout A girl scout who? A girl scout trying to sell cookies to support her alcoholic parents who beat her

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Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A mechanical wheelchair.

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BRANDON LUI ROCKSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

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Yo momma's so old, she lives in a nursing home and is on various medications that she needs to take to stay in optimum health.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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