Why is the baby not crying? Because it died of herpes. JUST KIDDING! Babies can't get herpes.

Duke Nukem censored line: What are you waiting for? the celebration of the day you crucified Jesus and ate his flesh and blamed it upon the anti christ because of... Victory? Because you know Jesus gave his life in order to prove that he was immortal and died for your sins because his life is eternal... Satan your Moral Man: Nah, lets just go with "what are you waiting for, christmas?" Now go celebrate you murdering your savior which said "ill be back" on the cross and returned three days later at his second coming? Seriously? I thought only Jesus: The guy that was totally an ARAB (deny it and be consumed in the flames of hell, not my problem), and Jesus: strikes back came out, where can I get Jesus: The third coming? Factoid: Yeah Jesus was totally a blonde haired white man which went clothed in the finest ARYAN silks, in addition he only drove in his MUSTANG 9001 and smoked Lucky Strike... Which did nothing for his luck...

One day Rebecca Black was driving down the street in a brand new convertible Luckily a policeman pulled her over after observing that she was far too young to be driving a car. Underage driving is a serious offense and should not be endorsed in music videos.

The guys Joke above me is funnier^.

What's big, white, and kills niiggers? Hurricane sandy

what did the banana say to the orange? nothing because a banana is a fruit

Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side... (other side as in the afterlife, for it committed suicide by crossing the road)

Happy Monday!

What's worse than a monkey attack. Nothing monkey attacks absolutely blow.

What did the white boy say to the black boy? You're black

Nathaniel Nugnes walks into a bra

You know whats funny? A man cooking dinner.

What is the difference between a horse? All the legs are of same length, especially the back ones.

Why was the drunk person arrested? He said to a police officer "I'm gay, so shut up you b****."

God, you know after creating humanity and kinda regretting it and stuff, fell into drinking and betting. He found Sin a fellow poker player, and all was good. Until God, drinking a bit too much bet a bit too many of his creds: Son. Jesus: Yes father. God: Uh, I kinda ended up low on cash on the poker game last night and I kinda well... I am gonna be frank here, I bet you and lost. NeroMetal Not dissing the bible, just enjoying the always brighter side of life eh? ;)

patient: Doctor, doctor, i think i'm a lemon. Doctor: racial segregation and presidency is my middle name.

What did the German say to the Rabbi? Hello. The German was also Jewish

Your momma is so dumb... that when she took an IQ test she score pretty low on it.

Touche.try eating something, I eat low carb crap when I am too sleepy, and today I guess it works.

there once was a chicken it was yellow

To momma's missing so many teeth it looks like her tongues in jail

charlie sheen becomes sober.

Why did the black women sing to the left to the left? Answer: because black people have no rights

Why did the Hispanic woman cheat on her husband? Because he couldn't maintain an erection, was boring, and collected stamps.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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