Why did Lucy fall off the swing? She had no arms and legs Knock knock Who's there? Not Lucy

What did the coworker say about the new girls butt Nothing be cause he was quite the gentleman and wanted to be respectful ts the woman as she already had enough problems such as being hit by a bus and dying.

A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks what he'd like. The man says something funny, but you kinda had to be there.

Q: How do you know what will happen when the world willl end? A: by experience

A black man and a white man were both pulled over for street racing. They both were also found to be drunk driving. Only the black man was arrested. It turns out the black man had just massacred an entire Amish village before going street racing to celebrate.

when Life gives you lemons, make lemonade. So i made some lemonade. Turns out the lemons Kawazaki Life gave me were poisoned and i shortly die afterwards. i wouldve died cursing out her name but she was cute so i forgave her in my mind. and thus i die in peace.

Large 4

Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

Two muffins are in an oven. And by muffins I mean jews. They both die a horrible death.

How did the Mexican cross the border without getting caught? He didn't; he was executed immediately.

What do you get when you cross a rooster with a cocker spaniel? Nothing, because roosters and Dog's don't mix.

Knock knock Who's there It's a policeman informing you that your parents have been killed in a car crash. Your Dad, who has been struggling with substance abuse and depression, found out his wife had been cheating on him, and in a drunken rage, wrapped the car around a tree.

why am I a hobo? because I lost my job.

what time does the japanese guy go to the dentist? well his appointment was for 11:30, so he might show up approximately 5 minutes prior to the appointment time, just to make sure everything goes steadily as planned

What do you call a shark on land A dead shark

What's black and white and red all over? A blood-soaked zebra

is it normal to be sexualy atracted to numbers?

so a man walks into a bar, then the prison warden told him to calm doun.

What's the difference between Miley Cyrus and a dead baby? One is a popular singer and the other is a dead baby.

Donald Duck walks into a drug store and asks the lady behind the counter for a bag of condoms. So the lady says, "Sure thing sir, would you like me to put that on your bill"? Donald says," THIT(Shit)NO, I'LL THUFFOCATE! (Suffocate)

What's the difference between acne and Michael Jackson? One is a an unsightly blemish that appears on your skin and the other is a dead pop singer.

what has wheels and runs on gas? a car with feet

what do you call a man that is hurt? A: you call him an ambulanse

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Pokerface.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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