why did the chicken cross the road? cause it can bitch.

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Why did the kid fail the test? Because he was retarded.

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Q: What happened when Timmy divided by zero? A: He got a syntax error.

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Guy 1 : what you watching? Guy 2 : a documentary on birds Guy 1 : can i watch it with you? Guy 2 : yeah sure go for it.....

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How much does a polar bear weigh?. . .Approximately 515 kilos.

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Why couldn't Peter climb the tree? Because he's a fish.

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ekoj

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't; by the time Keller owned her first dog, she was an adult with exceptional communicative abilities for one with her condition. She frequently wrote about her beloved dogs and is even credited with introducing the Akita breed to the United States. If her dog had run away, it would be unlikely that she would have been allowed further dogs.

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What’s the difference between Cool and Kool, the way you spell it

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Me: What as 9595 legs,3500 eyes and 9894 teeth? You: I dont know... Me: Me neither,but its on your leg.

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Yo Mama's so fat, she weighs more than an electron.

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Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

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What do you call a man with a convex isogonal nonprismatic head? Rhombicosidodecahedron head.

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Is Carly smart? No.

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A man goes into a store to buy some bread, He asks a woman behind the counter for help. She says " We have white, wheat, or rye. What kind would you like?" . To which the man replies, " It does not matter, I rode my bicycle.

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What's worse than 20 babies stapled to one tree? One baby stapled to 20 trees.

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45.

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Why was six afraid of seven? A: He just does.

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your fat

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What did the egg say to the cup? I love your hairdo! Girl, who is your stylist?

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, it's destroying his family.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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What do you call a man with a black head, a red body, white arms and yellow legs? To get to the other side.

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if life gives you lemons, make lemonade. unless you only get one lemon, then it really hard to make a good glass..and for that matter, who said you had a juicer? it would be really hard to just squeeze the juice out of a lemon. on top of that, what kind of situation am I in that I would need lemonade? let's say if life gives you lemons, determine the best use of them based on need, local weather and economic status

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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