A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

What do you call 4 Mexicans hopping the border? 4 Mexicans in search of a better lifestyle from poverty.

What is wrong with racism? A lot of things.

What do you call a Mexican mixed with a platypus? a pineapple

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

Q: Whats worse then being murdered? A: Nothing

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Who was the dinosaurs favorite NBA player? He didnt have one. Dinosaurs became extinct far before the NBA was established.

Why did the groom have cold feet? Because his socks were slightly damp resulting in evaporation and the cooling of his feet, as well as the cold weather in December.

There were a boy with cancer, and when a said "were" is because he is dead now

What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. Just kidding. He's paralyzed

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't

Your mom is so fat, she has sleep apnea.

What makes the world go round? Gravity.

knock knock you may come in

The sandwich asked the girl to make her a boy.

my aunt Always used to say"go with the flow" she died in a kayak accident last Sunday

My mother got hammered last night. We cried at her funeral.

Why are anti jokes funny? You can trick an old person to think they are

roses are black violets are gray im color blind

JUSTIN BEING SMART

- Knock Knock - Whos there? - No one

Why does your mom moan and scream at night? She had a rough childhood, filled with all types of despair and disappointment.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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