WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS ROAD?!!! cause he was silly

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Suzy has no arms! Knock Knock! Who's There? The Holocaust

What did the big pickle say to the little pickle? "I'm black."

what did the pornography filmer say to the asain man as he was having sex? im taking a highly pixelated recording of you and your partner engaging in sexual intercourse

How many trees does it take to screw in a light bulb? Trees are incapable of screwing light bulbs

A young boy trips and severly cuts his knee while running down his neighborhood street. He is promptly brought to the hospital to avoid receiving any serious infection.

What can fly, but is always under you? A flying worm.

Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He has retinopathy of prematurity and was born blind.

whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? babies aren't fruit.

Why did the fat person build a lift in his house? He was caring for his terminally ill mother which has a cancer and got both her legs amputated due to the cancer spreading to her legs.

You should read the Terms of Service.

Why was the poor man poor? Because he doesnt make money

What did the tree say to the kite? She got hit by a fridge.

Whats worse than getting a B+ in Biology? Getting raped by a scorpion.

How do you make your house smell bad? fart

rent a cops

Two kids are playing basketball. One says to the other, "FAILMUFFIN!" The basketball flies out of bounds.

What did the man say when he realized that he was late for work? "Shit, I'm late for work."

Knock knock. After 1 and a half minutes of waiting, Phil assumes his friend is not home, and promptly leaves.

A mexican fast food worker accidentally drops a cheeseburger on the ground. Realizing the floor is most likely unsanitary, he throws it out and gets the customer a new one.

What's brown and sticky? Most forms of excrement.

Why did Michael Jackson retire from basketball? Michael Jackson never played basketball, but was nonetheless one of the most successful musicians to ever live.

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Jehovah's Witness. Have you heard the word of God?

How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the fridge door and place the elephant inside. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the fridge door, remove the elephant, and place the giraffe inside. There is a party at the zoo. All of the zoo animals attend, except one. Which one? The giraffe, because he is in the fridge.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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