Well, its Eliza again, sorry to bother you Nero, I always thought you where good looking but I know that when it comes to you its not about the looks, you are far more than meets the eye. Neo-Nero was the guy we met at a certain meeting, the arrogant guy with the big forehead whose arms where shaking remember? I wont reveal more for his sake, he did not mean bad, he was just angry like the rest of us and felt responsible, again like many of us. So when can we meet you? I assume you wont be arriving soon, but Id really apreciate seeing you again, and considering neither I nor my parents (I asked them) have the money to come visit you, id appreciate a loan or something.

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a corvette? I didn't get 20 years for owning a corvette.

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How many babies can you fit in a blender? None, the blender is too small. Also it is illegal to kill a baby infant because they are considered human. You can get life in prison or the death penalty for committing such a heinous crime.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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why did the money fall out of the tree... because he was dead

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why was the baby crying? cause his abusive father broke his arm.

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-What's funnier than a dog with no legs? -The movie Dumb and Dumber, in my opinion.

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Q: Why couldn't the blonde add 10 and seven on a calculator? A: She couldn't find the 10 key.

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A woman walks up to a man in a supermarket and asks him where she can find the potatos. He says "I think they are all the way at the end on aisle 3" "Thanks" she says. Then she gets to aisle 3, and there aint no potatos!!!!

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An Asian woman is driving home from work and arrives in 30 minutes, which is strange because it normally does not take that long but she left during rush hour and the traffic was very bad at the time.

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what would be the most epic fight ever chuck norris vs superman vs all legendary pokemon vs a giant who would win it me (im superman)

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Ruebin is Red, Curtis is too. i think i need a sweaty poo

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In Soviet Russia, it is usually cold throughout the year, as it is located in a colder region of the planet.

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what did hellen keller name her dog? answer: unnumnumnum

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A child walks into a bar. I swear those jungle gyms are too short.

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What did the elderly lady say to the man? You still have not repaid my services

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Why was the teacher sad? Because her boyfriend broke up with her.

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Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

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knock knock who's their panda panda who shut up I never said yo name and don't call me black

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Why did Elmo get depressed? All his friends sacrifised themselves to satan

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:)Knock Knock :(Whose's there? :)None ya :(None ya who? :)None ya dam business.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he knew that the neighbors wouldn't "touch him there"

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Why don't gingerbread cookies have souls? Cookies don't have souls.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops