A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

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Hey, I just met you And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey, I just met you

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why was the cat black it was a black cat

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What does a salmon and a falcon have in common They both live underwater except for the falcon.

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Roofs are Red...I have a Cunt!!!

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Face...the other white meat!

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally Why can't Sally finish her ice cream She has no arms How do you fit Sally into a box? Put her in a blender. How do you get her out? A straw.

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Why couldn't the white guy tell the two asians apart? They were identical twins.

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what did the grandma do after she was pushing up daisies? washed her hands because gardening is a dirty activity

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Why Cant michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he is dying of Parkinson's disease.

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whats worse than a friend asking you if their ugly, telling them to look in the mirror.

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You know why Michael J. Fox makes really good milkshakes? ... because he uses the best ingredients

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Why did Steve Jobs die? Because he had cancer

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A boy walks up to a girl he finds attractive and says "You're body's kick'in! ... i mean...hey, do you know karate?"

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What's small, pale blue and sits at the bottom of the pool? "An over ripe blueberry."

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Knock Knock, Whos there? a baby nailed to the wall Orgasim

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- What's better than just sitting on a couch in a summerhouse with a bottle of wine and reading a good book? - An orgy.

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Why couldn't the 13 year old get into the pirate movie? He has cancer and is dying in the hospitable.

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How did the old man die? His family locked him in the basement and then burned the house

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Why was the black family eating at K.F.C? The food there is really good and they had a discount on the family bucket.

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How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You get the census of income per citizen and see who is at the top.

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How do you get a baby to start crying? Drop a brick on it. How do you get it to stop crying? Drop two bricks on it.

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Q.If your have $6.00 and I have a hair cut, how many donkeys are in the paddock? A. Aliens with a hat????????????

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Your moms so fat she weighs 200 kilograms

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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