So my girlfriend comes back from Jamaica this weekend. There are as many hairs per square inch on your body as a chimpanzee.

What is really hard around Kim Kardashian? Diamonds.

Q:Whats not funny? A: Antijokes

Did you hear the one about the broken pencil? Never mind, it's pointless

A man jumps of the roof of his building. The superindentant now owns the building and the man who jumped off the building has 59 fractures. Oh and he died.

Roses are grey Violets are grey Im a dog

Y didnt the grandma go to christmas? She died on thanksgiving

What's more annoying than reading a joke you can't understand? ?????

Wow, that is one of the things I would think I would react all bad to, but that`s, a strangely attractive quality in you.

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and an astronaut? One walks on the moon and the other has sex with little boys.

knock knock whos there? yo mama yo mama who? yo mamas mama!!

Why did the Cookie Monster go to the Doctor? Because He had an inoperable tumor in his lower intestinal tract.

Q: what happens when Justin Bieber walks into bar? A: three things, blood on the bar floor, another vister at the celebrity hospital, and Justin Bieber with knifes and darts stuck in his chest!

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? -Gave her a timeout

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My family is dead

What did the Liver say to the Heart? Nothing, Organs can't talk

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over by a car.

what is the difference between me and a grown black man.... i went to school

Why did the doctor not make it to his appointment in time? Because he died in 9/11!

knock knock whose there? penis penis who? penis want vagina

your goin down...aint no tomorrow...wha bang bang

A priest, a pastor, and a rabbi walk into a bar. All three are alcoholics and have done irreparable damage to their livers.

what did the dog say to the cat nothing because dogs can`t talk and if they could talk the cat wouldn`t understand him because cats can`t talk

Q. Why didn't the Hero rescue the princess? A. Because he crunched some numbers, realized the incredible odds against him, and decided against it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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