What's brown and sticky? Some brown pigment mixed with something sticky like glue.

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A horse walks into a bar. "Why the long face?" the bartender asks. The horse kills everyone in the bar and stampedes the other horses into town.

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A Nazi walks into a bar. No one really knows he's a Nazi and he doesn't talk about it that much in public, so he chats to some people then leaves after a few beers...

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Q:Why did the kid drop his ice cream A:He was hit by a car

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What did the pencil say to the other pencil? Nothing, pencils do not have the ability to speak as they are an object.

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why was the mother sad? her sons school was bombed by terrorists. there we no survivors

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Q: How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A: You murder her friends and family.

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You want to hear a joke? Republican

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? If i knew, I'd tell you.

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What's weird about four black men in a toilet? No one got shot.

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why do firemen wear red suspenders. I dont know because they go with there hat.

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A guy walked into a restaurant. He sat down and had a lovely meal left the restaurant got in his car and went home. The End

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Why didn't Suzie answer her mother? Suzie has a serious condition where she is mute and also severely deaf.

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A:Wanna hear a joke? B: Sure A: A joke

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Why was six afraid of seven? The world may never know.

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Billy and Joseph are playing Rock paper scissors. Billy says paper. Joseph proceeds to throw a rock as hard as he can at Billys face and sends him to the emergency room where he was later diagnosed with terminal testicular cancer.

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What happens when a bunch of animals break into your house... they eat you.

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You want some cake? Sure! Okay, go buy the ingridients and bake me some. YAY!

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society

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knock knock who's there? The police your family is dead

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A: Knock Knock B: 7

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why did nick leave school? bECAUSE HE WAS RETARDED

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Hey i just met you, and this us crazy! Heres some toilet paper, wipe my ass maybe?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops