Is this the Krusty Krab? Yes.

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Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced by the man with a gun.

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So a girl says "I want to be a banana when I grow up". She's set unrealistic goals and her parents fear she may be autistic.

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What would Osama Bin Laden be doing if he were alive today? Drowning

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Why did Lucy have blond hair? Answer: Because both her parents had recessive hair traits.

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Parents who drive with children on their lap should be wrapped with a huge diapper

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What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

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How do you get a black guy to stop hanging around in your front yard? Hang him in the back yard.

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What's big and black? An ant i lied about in being big

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Whats bright red and claws at the window? Baby in a microwave.

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CJISTHEBEST Sticks and stones may break my bones because i have osteoperosis.

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What's the opposite of a joke? An anti-joke. You're reading one right now.

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What do you do when you see an epileptic having a fit in the bath? Laugh at him

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Q: Why could John say goodbye to his girlfriend ? A: He didnt have one

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Q. Why was the boy depressed? A. Because he lives in a world where apparently all girls are right.

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How do you catch wet wood on fire? Ask a business owner in Ferguson, MO, to keep it in their store.

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Urban ghettos

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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how many shit jokes do you need to make before you realize that random does not equal funny? An egg.

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knock knock whose there tim tim who just kidding its fred

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Knock Knock. Who's There? I have cancer.

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roses are red violets are blue I can't rhyme refrigerator

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Hi, my name is Jake.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops