what do you call a bomb in a plane? A dangerous threat to lives

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What is dark in the darkness even if you shine a torchlight on it? A blackman

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Yo momma's so fat that when she asked the doctor, he said she could have such bad cardiovascular problems if yo mamma keep the typical sedentary habits, wich consist in a diet with a lots of fat and sugar, the lack of physical exercise and genetical characterists which make a person get fatter more easily.

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why did the cow cross the road because he wanted to go to the mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove

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Why did simran go over to maliyah and emma and andrea and alice and amanda and Every other fat ugly chicks house? Cause he cant fu*k anybody else!!!!!

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Boy: Mother, I'm dying! Mother: Ha, lol, I put poison in your cheese! Boy: MOTHER! Boy: *dies*. Mother: Ha, lol!

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Why didn't the little boy have a good time at his birthday party? Because his friends lit him on fire.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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A thief walks into a bank. He has an account there and withdraws 200 bucks.

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NO! I'm putting it in my front room, you sick bastard!

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What did God do to help the little girl with terminal cancer? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

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Why didn't the chicken not get across the road? Cause it's head got shot off by some drunk asshole

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So, a Vulcan walks into a bar... and he doesn't say anything, because Vulcan's suppress their emotions.

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Why can't Helen Keller read? Because she is dead.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Noooooooo...

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I'd love to submit an anti joke, but unfortunatley I don't own a computer.

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A man walks into an oven. He suffers severe burns and dies on a hospital bed

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How do prevent a black man from robbing your house? Lock you doors and perhaps get an up-to-date security system.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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In your case, maybe because it is time to stop thinking so much, and begin living life, if the world cannot appreciate a wise man such as yourself, maybe that man should stop being wise, and begin being happy.

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A bear walks into a bar..... The bartender asks " what do you want?" , he gets killed by the bear because he started talking to it Made by eli

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he got hit by a car because he wasn't aware of the dangers of not looking both ways. Bufoon

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Charmander is red,Squitle is blue,If you were a pokemon i'd choose you.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? He got many things, because everyone felt bad for him. Someone even brought him into their house so he could have Christmas dinner. On Christmas Day someone gave him fifty dollars to spend on food for his family. Only thing is, he didn't have a family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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