What did the fork say to the spoon? I have tongs and you don't. Ha.

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Boy: Why'd the chicken cross the road Mom: I don't know go ask the chicken

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One day a woman wrote a letter to her husband whom was at war. He received it, read it, and was happy to know she was thinking of him.

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What happens when you poke a ghost that is on the edge of a building?? Ghost aren't real, so therefor you will fall of the building and die????

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whats black and hangs from my tree my neighbor

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With all due respect, I do underestimate myself, there is not a single person I know that has not told me that, but if I wanted to, I would not even had to make the effort to have you removed, hell I had to pull favors and owe people things in order to keep you safe. I could have said the rest of you, but had I not known you, had you not been one of my co-workers back then, I would not have gone to the extremes that i did, you are beautiful, but what does that have to do with anything? Do you think that if I did not know you I would go "that one is sexy, release her?" Even if I did, I do not have authority, I work for them.

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What's green, has 4 legs and can kill you if lands on your head? a pool table.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your window is open I'm watching you

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did you know why people keep saying "you know...you know..." in their conversation? well i don't know

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I'm not sure, but the farmer must be very upset about the loss of one of his chickens.

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what do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet? last years hide and go seek champion

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice tits

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Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius.

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Hickory dickery dock, two mice ran up the clock. The clock struck 1 and the other got away with minor injuries.

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Jane was playing in the back of the bus with an eyeball...up and down,up and down.An old woman asks her : Jane,what are you doing?She responds : I`m trying to see who`s the driver

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders house?. No, Well neither has he...

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Why do so many black people like watermelon? The same reason so many white people, do. Have you had that stuff, it's really good!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

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What's long, brown, and in the toilet? The chocolate bar I just threw in the toilet.

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What doesn't kill you leaves you in a coma.

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What did the retarded handicap say to the bully who called him the biggest retard in the world? "atleast I didn't make SOPA"

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Mommy, why did daddy leave? Because you touch yourself at night sweetie.

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What came first? The chicken or the egg? The egg, because breakfast comes before dinner.

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what is black and white and read all over? a bankrupt newspaper that cannot afford color ink because the accountant misplaced company funds.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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