Your gay

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How do you get a blonde to tell time? By asking her what time is it.

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PROS = good things CONS = bad thing So, if PROgress is a good thing...then why is the US government call CONgress?

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Periods are red, waffles are blue, some poems rhym, this one doesn't.

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chuck norris will never have a heart attack because he has great cardiovascular health.

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knock knock who's there? a dog ......dogs cant talk ..................

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What's the worst subject in school? None of them. You need school to get by in life. Get over it.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says 'Why the long face?' The horse says 'My alcoholism is destroying my family.'

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Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

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Jack and Jill went up the hill. But it was winter and they froze to death

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A Muslim man gets onto a transatlantic airliner. All the other passengers are privately nervous, but no one mentions it.

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whats worse than biting your apple and finding a worm? WWII.

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Why did Dr. Phil fall of the swing? He couldn't figure out the couples problem.

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So God answered a paralyzed boy's prayer the other day...He said 'No'

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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A woman gets into the front seat of a car and starts driving.

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What do you call a Muslim Extremest at the bottom of the ocean? A terrible tragedy for the Muslim community.

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Doctor: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that your parents survived the car accident. Kid: And the bad news is? Doctor: I have a horrible sense of humor, they're both dead. I'm so sorry.

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What do you call a guy sleeping with little boys? Michael Jackson

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Your tell your girlfriend to make you a sandwich, she actually makes one for you.

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Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A blind deer.

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What does a shortstop do when the ball is by third base? He leaves the field to go to the hospital, his little sister just had a heart attack.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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