How many squirrels does it take to change a lightbulb? 42.

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What did chris say? Nothing, bushes cant talk!

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What's the difference between Jews and pizza? God likes pizza

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What is exceptionally dangerous? Shaving while taking a bath, because the risk of electrocution is extremely high.

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Why did the other reindeer make fun of Rudolph? He had a small penis

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Why did Marilyn Manson surgically remove 2 ribs from his body? To suck his own penis.

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Your mother's breasts sag so low that the late great impressionist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead...

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What walks on the three legs? Martin, he was born with a tragic birth defect and struggles to make a living.

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Knock knock no answer, as the tenant of the house was out shopping.

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What's worse than being raped? Not a whole lot-- rape is a very serious mental and emotional strain that will stick with a person for the remainder of their life.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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A grandfather clock fucked my bicycle!

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If your dying how would you avoid getting eaten alive by sharks or rip to shreds by a T-Rex? Fall on a sword

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Whats worse than a man who has had a hard day at work, he goes to a bar and gets drunk, he goes home and beats his wife? I his wife was fat and had cancer

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Your mom is so stupid... She was unable to go to college and therefore was not able to find a good job.

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Why do you do when a homeless man asks you for money Scream bicycle and then run

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What do you call an asian women running for president? A candidate.

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What is faster? A mustang or a corvette? A fighter jet you stupid idiotic piece of crap!

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What did the little boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? Cancer..... Just Kidding! He got a bike!

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Justin Bieber's gay!! My butt is sexier!(;

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What do you call a black guy surrounded by a gang of white guys? I don't know, maybe if you asked him his name you would find out.

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whats worse than 4 dead monkeys? everything! dead monkeys are awesome

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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