Three children had stumbled into an old cottage where they were met by a wizard. The wizard pointed out a slide in the corner of his cottage. He told the children that they could each go down the slide and that they could shout out a word while sliding. He told them that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "GOLD" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of solid gold. Due to its extreme hardness the child was killed immediately on impact.

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This week only, 2 for 1 misdemeanor shop lifting arrest. How can I do it? Because I can.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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What's big with fat all over it? Your mom on this dick

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HEY YOU! TISSUE!

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What did the rabbit buy the Jewish duck for Hanukkah? Nothing, animals don't celebrate holidays.

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rock-a-bye baby on the treetop When the wind blows The bass will drop!

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? ?? She had just prepared her breakfast and was late for her full-time job as a police officer.

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What do trees and people have in common? If you hit them enough times with an axe they will fall over.

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What was Dillon's old name? Dillon, I lied about the old name part.

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A rabbai , a mexican , and a ginger are In a car going over a cliff. Which one dies? Who cares?

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A dyslexic blind man

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Once upon a time a guy took his pants off why because he was touching himself

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Yo mama is so fat, we are all concerned about her weight.

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way do Japan bomb pearl harbor because America hat sex with China [watch Hetalia]

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Why did a blond killed herself? She couldnt find a corner in a round room.

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How do you describe a cranky rapist? Cranky and rapist

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A guy named M.C. walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "wheres the food?" The bartender says, " its in your stomach."

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Why did the cat lick the black guy. Because the cat thought it was dirty.

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Your mother is so fat that occasionally she'll have more than one serving of preserves on her toast in the morning

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A man told this joke once... it wasn't funny.

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Your mama's so fat that when she farted, gas came out!

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Jesse's mom is so god damn fat that it is an extreme danger just being around her

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whats worse than a worm in your apple? the Holocaust

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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