"Knock, knock." "You don't have to say that. The door's open, come on in."

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What's worse than terminal cancer? Two terminal cancer?

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What did the boy skip rocks with? -A rock

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The President walks into a local pub. Everyone shits their fricken pants because the President is here.

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Whats the difference between the Pope and acne Acne doesn't get onto a kids face until they're 13

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It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum... ...and I'm all out of ass but still have plenty of bubblegum to sit down and chew in a quiet and leisurely manner.

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way. ernkso

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What did the dead man say? Nothing because dead human beings have no beating heart and do not live so they cannot speak.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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What did the cow say when he saw his family get murdered? Moo.

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roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

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What's worse than having two girlfriends at once. Seven. Seven girlfriends. All across America.

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where was Billy during the bomb? Every where

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Why was Luke named Luke Skywalker? Because he walks to skies.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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What do you call a black guy who wins a race? A winner

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Knock Knock. Hello Frank! How'd you know it was me? There is a window next to the door.

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roses are red violets are blue What smells like poo? Your waffle's blue

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Why don't you make like a tree, and get out of here.

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How do you make Bill Gates poor? You take all of his money

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What's worse than a joke An ANTIJOKE!

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Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This joke is stupid, Chuck Testa.

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24

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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