Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their car with a coat hanger. They had left the keys inside and no-one was around to help.

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A young black man walks into a KFC. He takes a quick stop in the bathroom and continues on the road to his ivy league college.

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Roses are red. I have OCD. That rose IS red right.. Let me check again.

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What did one cow say to the other? Moo.

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile? " Hey Robin, get in the Batmobile."

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knock knock... whos there? NOT BIN LADEN!

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how do u make an infant cry? hit it in the face with a full grown salmon.

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Why couldn't the blonde turn on the TV? The TV was broken.

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The seven dwarves sat around the house feeling Grumpy, so Grumpy left.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men jump out, and the plane crashes anyway.

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On christmas, a bunch of happy kids get machine guns for christmas.Meanwhile in afghanistan, a bunch of dissapointed kids are getting ice skates.

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Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

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A young black girl walks in to a bar. Because she was not of the legal age to consume alcoholic beverages she was asked to leave in a peaceful manner.

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Why did the black man buy a gun? Because he and his family live in a dangerous neighborhood.

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why are you reading these jokes? i have nothing else to do. ok

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Why are all the tech support people from India? That's where the majority of call centers are located.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police The police who? Sir, your wife is dead.

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Why was the mother sad? Because she had just watched her beloved baby get shoved in a blender.

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Why did the Harry Potter fan cry in school? She ran out of tampons.

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Everytime God shuts a door, he opens a window... ...But I am the Goddamn locksmith!

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What's funny about a small child with no arms, no legs? Nothing.. Nothing at all.

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Why couldn't Billy eat his dinner? Because a black man amputated his hands.

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Why does the same anti-jokes pop up over and over again? Because people have no creativity.

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What is the best way to burn Jews Light them on fire

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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