there are 2 muffins in an oven one says "man its hot in here" the other says "shut up i hate this joke"

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Far from, yet all organizations are money based and put capitalism in front of all, so if lets say, one organization, needs help from another, a money transaction is made, I play a role there, as a well... Diplomat, its not my title, but my title is something I cannot reveal to anyone, not even my wife, id be putting myself and people in danger, but since I master things such as hypnosis, I can well, influence people, this is how I can pull of favors myself. Not favors such as "kill that guy for me", but more like... In your case. "If you are going to kill the wizard, please let the rest be, I know they are good people"

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How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? Suck its dick.

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What happened to the frog that broke down? It got toad.

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When Glenn looks in the mirror all he sees is Nicole Sipes.

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why is lady gaga so famous? because she has a penis.

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what's black, white, and red all over? A nun in a blender

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Hillary Clinton and 2 male aides were on a plane on a Friday evening which us not unusual for a secretary of state.

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what did the left foot say to the right foot? Nothing, feet don't talk

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face" and the horse says "my wife just died of skin cancer."

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What's black and white and enforces the rules at football games? A referee? Wow you're really smart.

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How does a chubby baby eat his chili In a very chubby way with his hands smearing it all over is face

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm not good at poems, nice titttttss.

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What did Jesus say when he walked on water? I'm drowning

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What do you call a piece of celery with peanut butter on it? your moms dead

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why did the black man rape the little girl? no reason, its just a part of life. oh well

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What do call a fly with no legs? Dead

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Every circle of friends has a "crazy one". If you can't figure out who the "crazy one" in your group is... Try harder. Either that or you are a terrible judge of character.

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mohammed ali walks into a bar, gets a drink, signs a few autographs , and a good time is enjoyed by all.

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Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michaelangelo.

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What do you get when you have 5 Russians, a few 8 year olds, and guns? A kidnapping

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Hitler walks into a temple..... Oh wait he died

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a short term memory Roses are red

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Where is the bathroom, I need to go poo.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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