batman has diarrhea

What do you call a baby girl that has grown up? A women

What do you call a bunch of Mexicans running down a hill jail brake

knock knock... whos there? NOT BIN LADEN!

How do you make a lumberjack cry? Kill his family

Well that sucks, your dad is dead.

Why does the pope doesn't use this finger? (raise a finger) That's mine!

knock knock Who's there? The Police! Your under arrest.

Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops.

Your mum is so dead, when I kick her she doesn't move.

So you are a giggler huh? You ticklish too? Anyway, you ever watched Deathnote? I was gonna ask something kinda important but it disappeared, so you tell me stuff first. Oh, my parents? Well, they where nice and sweet, but lets talk about something cruel and horrible. (If you switch up nice and sweet with cruel and horrible and the opposite, you will get the picture I am trying to pain here) What makes me so much more interesting huh? And why are you afraid you may look like an Alien? HEEEEEY! I am a legal citizen and I am not freaking Mexican!

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall?? A: It depends on how hard you throw them!!

Your name is Fired, your Boss comes up to you and says "Your Fired" You say "I know my name." Your boss gets mad and throws you in a chimney

what hurts more than getting shot in the arm Getting shot in both arms!

How do you kill someone? Shoot them. How do you kill someone with a knife? Shoot them How do you kill someone in a car? Shoot them How do you kill someone in a jet? Put the gun in the propeller

Roses are red Oranges are orange Nothing rhymes with orange Forever alone

wow, that guy is such a buzz-kill. worse than Buzz Killington!

How many pancakes does it take to make a dog house? Purple because, ice-cream has no bones.

why couldn't the girl sit down? she didn't have a butt.

How many owls can you fit in a bath tub?

Q. I look in a mirror. What do I see? A.My reflection

Your mom is so fat that when she wears a yellow raincoat outside, people notice a rather large woman who is enjoying the weather and wearing a yellow raincoat.

Q: What happened to the monkey when he jumped off the tree. A: He died Q: Why did the second monkey jump off of the tree A: He was attatched to the first monkey Q: Why did the third monkey jump off the tree A: Peer Pressure

A jew walks in the german bar, the jew is captured tortured, raped, and shot along with his entire family

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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