Obama

A horse walks into a bar. He ordered some fries.

There are three men in a canoe traveling upstream. One wheel falls off. How many pancakes fit in a doghouse? 9, because ice-cream has no bones.

Boy: Hey, guess who likes you. Girl: Who? Boy: NOBODY!!!!!!!!

does this look unsure to you?

a woman walks into a stall with her five yr old daughter. as the mom starts to due her buisness the girl looks down and asks her mom "Mommy why do u have a beard on ur pe-pe?"

tim tebow is a great quarterback

little billy has 50 chocolete bars, he eats 45 of them. what does he have now? diabetes, little billy has diabetes

A priest, a rabbi, and a preacher walk into a bar. They ordered a water each.

What do you call a black man with a gun? A police officer.

thomas hall= fuckin dikc

Why did Bob fall off the swing? Because Bob's a fish.

Q: What did the man say to the sexy female nurse with long hair and big breasts? A: I have diarrhea.

How do you make a bird drop a worm? Wring it's neck. P.S: If that anti-joke didn't persuade you to vote thumbs up for this post, then perhaps these delightful lyrics will convince you otherwise. I see them staring back at me They know my name The faces in the sky are looking for something more My friends have paper smiles and laugh at me in all my trials Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia My friends have hollow eyes They're made of shapes and curvy lines Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow [. From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/e/elena-siegman-lyrics/pareidolia-lyrics.html .] My pareidolia The loneliness is only missed when I am alone O yeah I might try to find my light tonight Hide my sight from eyes I try to fight My nine eyes of light die by the blight Ride white knight unite my plight tonight They're inside me They're inside me I'm inside out I'm inside out They're all around Within without Within without They're inside I'm outisde They're all around They're all around They're inside me I'm inside out They're all around Within without It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia la lalala lalala lalala lala

What's worse than heartbreak? Getting run over by a steamroller.

whats worse than dropping your ice cream down the stairs? dropping your baby down the stairs

Anti jokes are funny, but also not.

DERP

What do you get if you cross a mexican with a pineapple? Nothing, they are two different physical forms thus incapable of becoming a new object.

Why was Billy sad? An evil clown hit him with an Axe.

What happens to koala bears when the forests of Australia catch on fire? They burn.

A dyslexic man walked into a bar. Even though he couldn't read the sign, it was still a bar.

your fat

What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock-eater

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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