One night a kid heard thunder and got scared. So he went to his parents bed and asked he could sleep with them. His mom said " Sure just don't look under the covers." He said okay and he looked under the covers and said " Daddy, why is your snake in Mommy's garden?"

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a pedophile.

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So a seal walks into a club...

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Jesus said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But, John came fifth and won a toaster.

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What did the blind, deaf and mute girl get for christmas? Cancer.

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there was an owl, she had a baby, threw up, then died

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I made a friend today. His name is don. He poops burritos. I like burritos.

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Knock knock Who's there? Adolf Adolf who? Adolf Hitler. Are you a jew?

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: It doesn't matter, the lightbulb never went out in the first place.

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Take my wife. . . . to the hospital. She is dying from a gunshot wound to the head.

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A tourist is hungry, so he asks a stranger to point him to the nearest McDonald's. The stranger points to the McDonald's across the street. As the tourist crosses the street, he gets hit by a car AND DIES. McDonald's kills.

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What do you call a chav in a box It depends what kind of a box If it is a coffin you call him dead If he is in a cardboard box you call him homeless It really just depends

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Why do giraffes have long necks? Evolution.

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BIG PENIS

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Q: What do cooks do for a living? A: Eh muffin.

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That awkward moment were your giving your girlfriend a blowjob then you realize your giving your girlfriend a blowjob.

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Dont drink and drive. You might spill some.

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What does a blonde's vagina taste like? The same as her brain, cabbage

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99% of guys are hot. The other 1% go to my school.

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A man walks into a bar.

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A horse walks into a bar. He ordered some fries.

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Obama

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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