Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? He's dead.

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NeroChan, I have said nothing to you, that you have not taught me, if nothing else you have indirectly inspired yourself, you will get back on your feet, you just need to take one step at the time, I know how ambitious you are, but you always focused on helping others, hiding, seeing yourself as a sinking ship, trying to help as many as possible before you pass away. We can work trough this together, it is easy to figure out that you are trying to protect others from what you feel that you have become, something that cannot be repaired, something that was never meant to be fixed, but to be used until it had no more to give.

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A man walked into a pole barn oh wait I meant a pole bar so it actually hurt.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Why was the Indian at the casino? He had a gambling addiction.

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Why couldn't the teen go to the prom? He was busy working to help his mom recover from breast cancer.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a registered sex offender

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What do you do if you run over a black man? Call an ambulance... he's probably about to die.

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I like my coffee how I like my women Without a penis

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There is a boy in a school............. SUDDENTLY, PEDOBEAR APPEARS!

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whats long hard and full of seamen? a submarine.

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What kind of people have fat lips? People who have gotten punched in the lip or have suffered a serious lip injury that has caused their lips to swell up.

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Whats the difference between a white man and a black man? Their skin color.

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So there was once this cool little dude that had a purple nose. People would walk by on the streets and say, "Hey! That's a cool nose!" Purple nose man appreciated that they didn't pretend it wasn't there, and instead celebrated the diversity. The next day, he was scalped.

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A man and woman walk into a funeral home. They are both very sad about the loss of their father who they loved dearly.

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Whats the difference between me and a ghost? What? Ghost are not dolphins

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Emily Scarpello...Fat Couch

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What did one ginger say to the other We have red hair

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Q: What do you call those assholes who always volunteer in lectures? A: Assholes. Fcuking assholes. They created the word asshole. Assholes

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yo momma so fat, Bob's furniture store is having a sale on wednesday at 5:00.

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roses are red, violets are blue. Some poems don't make sense, Salad.

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cops:knock- knock person: who's there? cops: the cops person: the cops who cops: we found the body #Casey Anthony

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Why was the Asian girl doing a math problem? It was her homework that her teacher assigned her class.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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