Why was Mary's turkey dry on Thanksgiving dinner? Because she left it in the oven too long.

Roses are Red And sometimes yellow My mother is mellow I have terminal cancer. I also fisted my grandpa's anus last night

Is maynaise an instrument?

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

The asian boy only did an hour of study....... nothing was heard of him after his mum found out

Q-Why did the little boy feel hot? A-Because he faceplanted into a bonfire.

How do you kill Helen Keller? With a gun.

Why couldn't the old man see? He was deaf

Roses are red, Violets are blue, when the bass droped, my balls did too.

Doctor Doctor I think I'm a dog. Sit down on the couch and tell me about it. Ok.

What did the robot say to the child? Nothing, the robot malfunctioned and strangled the child.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What can I get for ya?" The man replies, "A beer."

How many cupcakes are there in the world joe How many? I don't know I was asking you.

How does a black guy die? He doesn't , he's black

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

a man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. The Bartender says okay, here you go.

Why did the boy throw his alarm clock out of the window? Because he was angry at the alarm going off

What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? THE CHICKEN!

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

How do you break your fan in the summer You dont its hot and you need it

What came first, the chicken or the egg? Well, to tell you the truth, I think that the chick-fa-lea came first.

what's better than being stabbed in the testicles with a biro? the Silversun Pickup's album Neck of the Woods

What's funnier than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? Nothing, infant mortality is not a laughing matter.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...