have you seen Helen Keller's bird house? neither has she

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An orphan falls off a cliff.

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What did the blonde say when she saw a tan button on her calculator? That must mean tangent.

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What did the fish say to the Asain man Nothing. a fish can not talk

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Q: Wanna hear a joke? A: the WNBA

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Why does the boy like ice-cream? It tastes good.

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Yo momma so ugly, she couldn't fulfill her dream of being a model.

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Fiona: SHREK! WHERE WERE YOU TONIGHT? Shrek: Out clubbing with the boys. Fiona: What did you do. Shrek: Eat Jews. Borat: iz vedy naaace

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Q: What was the proctologist doing on the street? A: He was observing the assfault.

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Why was the ghast from minecraft crying? His family died

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Fine, ladies first.

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what happened to the slut last time she opened her legs. a bee flew in and stung her. turned out she was deathly allergic. she died a painful death.

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Did you hear about the Australian man who was jumped by a gang of Americans with knifes? He had his cash and possessions stolen from him, and had to spend two weeks in hospital due to stab wounds.

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What did Dmitri say to all his friends? Nothing he has no friends

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Three men walked into a bar. You'd think one of them would of ducked?

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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What is long, hard, and full of seamen? a school bus, if you consider children to be seamen

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Jesus walks on water Chuck Norris swims through land

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I used to have a shirt just like yours, except it was green. And it was a bicycle.

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What's the first thing that goes through a persons mind when they get shot in the head. The bullet.

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I love you more than other things that are significantly less important to me than you are

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What did you call something that is long, hard and full of seamen? A ship.

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Why did the black man get drenched by a fire hose because he was on fire

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Is that a banana in your pants or do you just have an abnormally large penis?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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