What's Blue and tastes like orange cake? A blue cake.

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What's sad about a girl getting hit in the face with a shovel? The shovel got dented..

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WELL YOU ARE ALL A ROOF. So pie, my dearest Adam. Like a butthole.

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A horse walks into a butcher shop and asks for two apple pies. The butcher says "sorry, but we don't have apple pies. It's a butcher shop." And the horse says "nevermind, I came here on my bike."

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One day a boy asks his teacher what blue velvet is then the teacher says "we don't ask questions like that in my class go to principal's office now"so the boy goes to the principal's office and then the boy asks "what is blue velvet"then the principal says"no one says that in my school get out" so the boy goes home and asks his mom what is blue velvet then his mom says you don't say stuff like that in my house get out!so the boy see's the Mayer. So the boy asks the Mayer what blue velvet is then the Mayer says no one says that in my town get out of my town! So the boy see's a man and the boy goes to the man and the man asks what happend to you and the boy says well I got kicked out of school kicked out of my house and got thrown out of town just because i asked what blue velvet is! So the man tells the boy that there is a lady across the street. So the boy is in the road and then the boy gets ran over and dies. So the lesson here is look both ways before crossing a street

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What happens when metal and ice collide together? The Titanic

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What's the difference between Barney the dinosaur and Santa? Barney Loves you.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the axe murderer. Did it work? No.

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Why didn't the Mexican have car insurance? Because he was 12 years old and didn't have a car so he had no need for car insurance.

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Which came first? The chicken? Or the egg? Whichever one was more sexually excited i guess.

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Whats the difference between a hoover and a harley? one is a vacuum, and the other is a motorcycle.

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You wanna know what's out of this world? The moon

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Why was the man worried? because he had a shotgun up his ass

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Where did Mary go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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What happens when you give a boy a cookie? He falls asleep and his parents think he was kidnapped by a serial killer.

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how do you kill a blond? there are many ways but every one of them is illegal and could be criminally chargeable.

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WHO THE FUCK IS NERO AND THAT BITCH THAT CLAIMS TO BE NOT NERO BUT NOT NEROMETAL OR WHATEVER? THEY BOTH CLAIM TO BE THE FUCKING MORAL MAN? I STARTED MY RISE TO INFAMY FOR LIKE... Fuck, when I was still studying, it was a fucking social project to prove that others opinions DO NOT MATTER SHIT IN THE END! And now these bastards (some cult faggot and Some "Nerometal" which are probably the same queer) CLAIM TO BE THE MORALMAN? I AM THE MORAL MAN! I AM YOUR FRIENDLY RAPIST/SOCIOPATH! YOU FAKE QUEERMASTERS! I CHALLENGE YOU!

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The blond detective was searching a crime scene and replied to the police officer, "I smell something fishy about this situation." She was on her period as a matter of fact, and bled all over her trousers.

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What happened to Grant when he did a cart wheel? Chuck had sex with Victoria

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Why did the retarded guy follow the 7 year old? Because he's a stalker.

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. Steven Hawking is disabled from the neck down. I lied.

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A guy walks into a bar and falls.

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Q. why did the chicken cross the road A. damn it this joke is a million years old shut up

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Why was the black man picking cotton? Because he was in an area where slavery is a socially and morally accepted practice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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