A muslim walks into an airport. He then buys his ticket, boards his plane, and his flown to his proper destination.

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What is worse than the holocaust? DUH! A worm in MY apple!

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What did the three year old say when he dropped his milk? Shitting buggery!

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Why was the man "hanging around"? He committed suicide.

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What do you call a black drug dealer? A black man that works as a drug dealer

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What's the difference between a BMW and a pile of dead babies? There isn't a BMW in my garage.

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What is long, hard, cries a lot, and can't fall down a man-hole? A baby with a javelin through its neck.

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A man climbs a tree, falls, and breaks his legs. He will never walk again

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why did the supermodel have sex with the janitor? she loved him. and he was brad pitt.

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The boy asks his dad if he can make him a sandwitch The dad reply's " no thats your moms job"

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A horse walk into a bar. Several people leave, as they recognize the potential danger in the situation.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

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Why did they bury the indian at the top of the hill? Because he was dead.

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A bloke runs into the bank, says to the girl "Stick 'em up!" She says "Righty-o, matey" and sellotapes his bollocks to the ceiling.

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how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 16 if the ice cream melts

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the midget went to the midget store

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Did you fall on your head when you were a baby Oh, Im very sorry.

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Q: what happened to the man who dropped the soap? A: nothing, he casually bent over and picked it up.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the ocean? A tragic drowning victim. And later, food for sharks, probably.

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what's the difference between a jew and a pizza? a jew is a member of a religion called Judaism, they're generally tall and have curly hair, however not in all situations is this true. They celebrate Chanukah and passover and many other holidays. Pizza is an italian dish, it's round, has red sauce and cheese on it and is pretty tasty.

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What do a purple cow and a red fire engine have in common? Both like eating pizza on Fridays, except for the red fire engine.

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Why can't helen keller drive a car? Because she is a woman

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What did Raymond say when josh ate him? Nothing because Raymond was dead.

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Why was it raining lobsters? Because they ran out of men. Why did the basketball player miss the net? Because he was hit by a lobster

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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