roses are red, violets are blue. you've got Alzheimer's, it sucks to be you

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Knock Knock No one's home Okay, I'll come back later.

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Pickles

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What do you call an armless legless man swimming? Dead

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Four brothers joined the army and were deployed to Iraq. Two of them committed suicide.

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Knock knock Who's there Orange and Banana Orange and Banana who? ... The man opened the door and saw a bowl of oranges and bananas.

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What's worse than an ice cream cone falling over? The Holocaust. What's worse than that? Two ice cream cones falling over.

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Why did the plane crash? A loaf of bread was the pilot

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Two guys walk into a bar, and they ordered two drinks. Then the bartender said, "Two dollars, please." - Brandie PANG

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"Where are my shoes?" asked the man. "On your feet," I replied. "You are a paraplegic and have no feeling from the waist down."

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Roses are red My name is Dave This poem makes no sense And it doesn't rhyme either

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Why do zebras have stripes? I don't know.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, he was hit by a car. I lied about him crossing the road.

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How many juice does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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One day... Jack: Good morning Ben: Good morning The End.

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What do you get when you fall in love? A guy with a pin to burst your bubble.

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A.M.E.V.A.A A-ny M-essage E-xpressed V-ia A-cronym is A-wesome

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how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 16 if the ice cream melts

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Dumbledore dies.

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Why was the man "hanging around"? He committed suicide.

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A horse walk into a bar. Several people leave, as they recognize the potential danger in the situation.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did they bury the indian at the top of the hill? Because he was dead.

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What did Big Dog say to Little Dog? "We are both dogs."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops