- Anti Joke

Knock Knock Who's there? Xiao Kaan Xiao kaan who? Fu*k you ugly lauuhhh

WHY DO IDIOTS RIGHT STUPID JOKES BECAUSE THEY HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO WITH THERE LIVES.

There once was the worlds most important people on an airplane. All of them. They were a Boy Scout with a hiking pack, World's Oldest person, World's Smartest person, a Scientist who had the cure to cancer, and the World's Richest man. The Pilot told them that the plane was running out of gas and they would have to bail. But there was a problem, two people were going to have to die. They were only two parachutes short. So the Scientist grabbed one and said, "I'm the only one with the cure to cancer I've got lives to save." And he bails. Then the World's oldest person jumps out with a parachute saying, "I Still Have A Life To Live!!!" Then the Richest person realizes there is two parachutes left. He says, "I have the most money so I have to go because I could save America from going bankrupt." Grabs a chute and jumps. Then, the world's smartest person just happens to be so selfish and bails with the last Parachute. So the Pilot and and the Boy Scout were left. The pilot was kind enough to let the Kid go because he still had he longest life to live. But the kid said no, we could both go. The pilot said no you go. The kid was still being stubborn. And said No, we could both go, The world's smartest person took my back pack, there is one chute left, we could share it. And so they both jumped and landed safely on the ground. And that was the end of the World's smartest man.

Yes you better be sorry, I'm gonna suck my mums p e n i s tonight! - Dylan Hodge

A: If a quiz is quizzical, what is a test? B: A test can be many things: 1. A procedure for critical evaluation; a means of determining the presence, quality, or truth of something; a trial: a test of one's eyesight; subjecting a hypothesis to a test; a test of an athlete's endurance. 2. A series of questions, problems, or physical responses designed to determine knowledge, intelligence, or ability. 3. A basis for evaluation or judgment: "A test of democratic government is how Congress and the president work together" (Haynes Johnson). 4. Chemistry a. A physical or chemical change by which a substance may be detected or its properties ascertained. b. A reagent used to cause or promote such a change. c. A positive result obtained. 5. A cupel. A: Oh.

this last joke was a correction to the other one

Why did the kid die last night? because his mum stabbed him multiple times in the chest.

whats black and white and covered in blood Michael Jackson being stabbed

What's the difference between a guy who sees the glass half empty and a guy who sees the glass half full? The first guy is happier because his tables tip more than the second guy's.

whats the best selling shampoo for children and family? gerrmany's shampoo german engineering. i'm not sure I get anti jokes wait you don't need engineering for soap? HITLER DID -audience- thats mean who else was mean? uhh Mao? Stalin? STDS? -audience- no HITERWAS MEAN wat happen to him he became the leader and fuher of germany and was onn world domination? no he died abullet and a pill died killed him oh god 11 million people died because of him and we make jokes about it -its ANITjokes okay? t make this S$75 any better doesn't revive the fallen -okay......... LOL I bet that soap was actually eaten before by actidneet -jesus shutup okay ok.. sorry man .. wait man? single person? but waht abut "audience" I guess I want a crowd as big as hitlers but all I get is my twisted autism - billy turner died from autism and arrested for practicing naziism in public.

Q: How man Jews can you fit in a box? A:if your German than you tell me.

knock knock who's there who who who and if u sat something about an owl I'll kick u in the face u fat cike

What did the blonde waitress say to the man with a curly moustache? Good evening, are you ready to order?; yes [x2]; and what would you like with it?; certanly; there you go; no, I'm sorry; right.

whats worse than killing people that have bags on their heads? finding out that the people that u have just killed were your own children.

Q: Why do only 10% of women go to heaven? Your question is fundamentally wrong. Religion is a collective hallucination.

A black man, an asian man, and a gay man walk into a bar. What do they do? They mourn the loss of their dead friend.

friends are like snowflakes. if you piss on them they go away

How high is the grass in Germany? Approximately the same height as the grass in America.

roses are red violets are blue ill keep u in my heart forever and ower baby to

Roses are black Violets are black I lost my eyesight at two years old and all I see is black.

What do you call a lubia chin jew slave? Kia

How do you make money? Kill babies and sell them.

What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? It was my car.

What dod the boy with no arms get or christmas? Nothing he can't open them!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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