Roses are red, Violets are blue, I touch myself at night.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree??? Because it was dead.....

i remember when i was a child i wanted a skateboard but my parents would never buy me one so late one night i crept downstairs and got a hammer and some wood and i beat them to death my foster parents baught me 5 skateboards

What's the difference between Tom and Jerry? One is a cat, and the other is a mouse.

knock knock. who's there? Kony. Kony who? Kony says:" Uganda be abducted"

Mario walks into a bar A yak walks into a bar An orange walks into a bar 30 men barf in a juicy yot

What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

Knock knock, who's there? Your mom! Oh I'm comming.

How does micheal Jackson know when it's bed time? When the big hand touches the little hand.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

Q - What do you call a bunch of white people on a bench? A - The nba - Cool Bean

why did the chicken cross the road? its a chicken giving it the tendencies to wander if not properly fenced in.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was stressed & having alot of financial, mental and physical problems so he crossed the road in hope to kill himself. And he did he got ran over by a car, may his soul rest in peace.

Why is Osama Bin Laden scared of the dark? To be honest, I don't know, and I doubt you do either. Osama Bin Laden has been a fugitive on America's Top Ten Most Wanted list for over 10 years; there is no way that you could possibly know such personal information about him if the United States government can't even locate him and prosecute him for the heinous crimes he committed against the U.S. Don't ever lie to me again.

Theres this black guy who goes to a gun shop and buys a .45 and then goes to get a permit and uses it responsibly....

Yo momma's so ugly that she could not find another partner after the tragic death of your father

What's Funny About A Black Man Being Shot? Nothing, That Man Was My Friend.

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall, He cracked his skull and died on impact. He will be missed.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

Why did god make women? Because women are equally important when it comes to the birth to maintain or species.

What's the difference between a tiger and a shark? One's a land mammal.

What's funnier than 100 dead babies? Everything.

Knock knock. Who's there? Fire extinguisher. Fire extinguisher who? POMEGRANITES.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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