How many owls can you fit in a bath tub?

What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, walls are inanimate things therefore it cannot talk.

An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? YOU'RE UNDER ARREST! GET DOWN ON THE FLOOR! NOW!

Hitler, Mussilini, And Hideki Tojo Walk In To A Bar Mitzvah, Everyone Was Brutally Murdered & No One Survived.

Why did Susie start shaking? She had continuous ceasars

What did the Dildo say to the banana? Nothing, unless you're high on acid.

What's the easiest way to get a cat out of a tree? Call the fire department and allow them to safely reach the cat and properly extract it from the tree while you watch from below.

what did the kid with no hair get for christmas? cancer.

Nero, I mean it, I want you and your wife to have 15 million dollars, it wont buy you the happiness you seek, but it helps no?

Your mother sleeps around so much that I worry that she may be taking too much medicine for her insomnia.

why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7-8-9

What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

roses are red, windows are clear, get off your ass and bring me a beer

Whats worse than cutting yourself with scissors? Being forced into a blender by your baby's ghost.

You're so fake, Barbara Millicent Roberts is jealous of you.

Your mothers so dumb that when she had to take a math test, she received a significantly lower grade than the rest of her classmates.

Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

What is the difference between a black man dead in the middle of the road... and a deer dead in the middle of the road? One is a human and one is an animal

What's worse than an hours detention? Gettind raped by a horse anally.

A man gets a new job working for his boss. Later, he beats his boss in a fight, quits his job, and starts his own business. Historians later concluded that the man's life would serve as a perfect national allegory for the USA.

A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are about to be executed by a firing squad. Before they shoot the brunette, they ask if she was any last words. “Look, a tornado!” Then they shoot her.

Poop

gingers

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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