There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

9 tottenham fans walk into a french bar 2 minutes later French fans attack them saying this is for making our history lessons boring 1 shouts ohh the holocaust French fans ash him even more 5 say there call the jew squard next minute there getting attacked by a bunch of kids and lying that there were 30 neo Nazi men.

If you don't see banners here, it doesn't mean they are not there...

Q:Why did the man fall down the stairs? A:Because someone pushed him down.

What do you call a deer that has no eyes? I have no eyedeer

What's worse than finding a knife in your car? Finding a car in your knife.

Take part of what?

How do you get the pesky neighborhood kids off your front lawn? Molest them.

how many jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? one................ standing on a pile of dead babies.

Did you hear about the dyslexic insomniac that stayed awake all night wondering if there really is a dog?

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

why did Sarah fall of the swing... she had no arms Knock Knock.... Whos there .... Not Sarah

your mom was so fat that she died.

Did you hear about the Australian man who was jumped by a gang of Americans with knifes? He had his cash and possessions stolen from him, and had to spend two weeks in hospital due to stab wounds.

What is the difference between a calendar and you? A calendar has dates!!

there once was a cat it was brown? fus-roh-dah

What's the difference between a plum and an elephant? They're both purple except for the elephant.

Why is 6 afraid of 7 ? : Because 7 8 9

Q: What causes earthquakes? A: Your mother walking.

Why was the ghast from minecraft crying? His family died

ROMEO ROMEO WHEREFORE ART THOU ROMEO

What did the follower of Neronism say to the follower of Christianity? Nothing, Neronism doesn't exist. -KyuremCult

why did the man choke at the lunch table. Police there is a banana attacking me what should I do?

What funny about AIDS nothing its a terrible disease

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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